The longer you have traveled the road of infertility the more likely you are to notice every little 'baby' thing which typically leads to over-analyzing..well...just about everything.
It seems that everyone I know (a slight exaggeration) just had a baby or is pregnant. The last time I counted I could easily name 10 people without trying. This mass number of pregnant couples surrounding me everywhere has sparked a question. Do they fully appreciate the miracle they have been given?
Some might scoff at my question and reply "Of course they do!"...but do they really? Do any of us REALLY understand all we have been given without having seen the other side? To help put this in perspective here are a few others:
~Do we remember to be grateful every time we sit down to dinner? There are starving people all over the world while we eat and snack whenever we see fit.
~Do we remember to be grateful for the clothes we wear to keep us warm during winter months? There are homeless right now who would be thrilled with a fraction of what we have.
~Do the world famous artists and composers fully understand their gift? Sure, they know they have what others don't, but can they understand the person who has practiced for days, weeks, years and still not able to achieve what they can in a shorter time with less effort?
Even IF we remember to be grateful each and everyday for the blessings bestowed upon us I can't help but think that we still don't hold the same gratitude as someone who has gone without. Few people have truly gone from 'rags to riches' and those who have would be the exception.
To be clear, there is no doubt in my mind that these pregnant couples are happy, feeling blessed and in awe of what they have created. However, as I sit across the church or restaurant from them I find myself completely overwhelmed with emotions and at times I feel I might be more in awe and amazement at their ability than they are.
This question of course will never truly be answered. If we were to poll all the pregnant couples their answers would reflect that they are, in fact, grateful, happy, amazed. But deep down, infertile couples are feeling more, even if we aren't the ones experiencing pregnancy.
Of course, all of this is merely my opinion. My brain runs rampant for hours on end with pointless questions and scenarios, none of which hold definitive answers. May we be ever mindful of the blessings that we have received that we may focus less on the desires of our heart. God has plans, big and small, for all of us.
As always, your thoughts and comments are greatly appreciated.
Hugs,
Kel
